So every weekday I roll out of bed around 6:30 a.m., leash up the dogs and stumble out to the back yard for the morning canine constitutional. And every, every blessed morning it happens: I feel something stringy and creepy brush my cheek. Auugh! I've walked through the spider web again!
Shuddering, I brush frantically at my hair and face, certain I can feel web matter sticking to my eyeball; unlikely, since I wear glasses. I turn around and see the rest of the web, an intricate, finespun work of art stretched across the far end of my clothesline post.
Every morning there is a single strand of web stretched from the post to the blackberry bushes. Every morning I walk through it.
If the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result, who is crazier here, me or the spider?
My money's on the arachnid. Her money, of course, is on me.
This is probably an excellent metaphor for life in general and my life in particular. Whenever I want or need to make a change in my life I tend to chase my tail for awhile, doing the same things over and over (with subtle variations), making myself insane when the results don't change before I exhaust myself, step back and evaluate what I'm doing and what actually needs to be done.
Is this an alcoholic thing or just a being a garden variety human thing? Could someone let me know? I must confess to a secret hope that it's an alcoholic thing. Then I can say, "See, I can't help it! It's an alcoholic thing!" To which my friends in recovery will say, "Yes, it is an alcoholic thing. And you are responsible for changing it." That's the trouble with living this sober life. I have to be a responsible adult. Ironically, that is also the gift of this sober life. That, and my kickass friends.
The solution to the web/face thing was surprisingly simple: DUCK! This morning I finally remembered to duck before I got webbed.
But here's the best part: I didn't need to duck. This time that thin filament of web had been strung higher. I could walk right under it and never touch it.
Now who's insane?
Don't answer that.